Life is really such a conflict for me. I find myself battling my inner demons everyday. A part of me wishes that I could be more focused, diligent and dedicated in what I do. To be able to think clearly and know what is important for me and not get distracted by the people around me. But it just seems so tough. To try to break free from all the temptations and distractions from the world.I always seem to be trying too hard.And trusting myself too little. Am I thinking too much about how I should portray myself to others? Does it really matter what they think of me?
Why am I fussing over these tiny self-image matters when there are people out there who have problems with health and yet are living their lives to the fullest? What is hindering me?
What is the meaning of all this competition? What is the meaning of friendships forged? How long could I survive on superficial friendships and senseless studies? How long could i hold out without God? Not long I know.
God, please help me to see what is important. Help me to treasure the true friends that i have. Help me to learn how to say NO to others and not be forced to conform for survival's sake.
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