It's so bloody irritating.
I am having a breakout.
I am disorientated.
And i totally threw my face away today.
All bad things always seem to come in a package to me.

Ah
Stupid me
Silly me
Why did I bob my big head into the gents!?
WHy did I look in THE direction?!
Aren't I WAY WAY WAY past that stage?

At DG.
I found it tough.
REAL REAL tough to worship.
I realised that I had forgotten God again
I had not spent time with Him
It's like the same old familiar story.

Came back
Mum's at it AGAIN.
I hate it!
Why cant she just GET A LIFE!
ARGHH!
WHy must she try to control everything?
WHy doesnt she trust me enough to let me take care of my own things?
WHy must she poke her head or lend her EXTRA hand into every single thing belonging to me?
Why must I always return to find that my table has been rearranged?
I don't like that feeling!
It feels like I can't even take my own stuff into my own hands.
It makes me feel like Im being treated like a kid.


Questions and frustrations.
Since when was it that " my latter will be greater"?
It seems like a lie to me.
Seems like I sang that song with conviction only in my dreams.
It's tough.
Sometimes i feel like I have to force myself to feel a particular feeling during worship so that I do not stumble others.
Sometimes, it seems to come from the bottom of my heart.
At other times,
I seem to have to get the feeling out.

Alright
Im falling asleep in front of the com.
Life's like this.
We complain and complain
And at the end of it all,
we get tired.
And we just keep silent
After a pathetic sigh of resignation.